Jokes of the Day
I have been collecting jokes since I was 8. These are a few of the latest.
Quotes
The federal government is starting to plan for climate change by making extended forecasts that can help people plan for extreme weather - because what can go wrong when you combine the efficiency of government with the accuracy of weathermen?
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A new study found that women think men holding a guitar are more attractive, even if they are not playing it. In a related story, guys with an accordion will die alone.
Whenever I'm stuck in traffic, I can't help but wonder, "Where did the creator of The Jetsons go, and why hasn't he done something about this?"
A Pennsylvania woman convicted for shoplifting was sentenced to wear a badge that reads "Convicted Shoplifter." However, her lawyers hope to plea bargain down to a bumper sticker reading "I'd Rather Be Stealing!"
Prayer and Fire
A tale is told about a small town that had historically been "dry," but then a local businessman decided to build a tavern.
A group of Christians from a local church were concerned and planned an all-night prayer meeting to ask God to intervene.
It just so happened that shortly thereafter lightning struck the bar and it burned to the ground.
The owner of the bar sued the church, claiming that the prayers of the congregation were responsible, but the church hired a lawyer to argue in court that they were not responsible.
The presiding judge, after his initial review of the case, stated that "no matter how this case comes out, one thing is clear. The tavern owner believes in prayer and the Christians do not."